Pain and Joy

“Perhaps no part of the cost of being a foreign missionary is greater than the loneliness. The alien experiences a sense of utter isolation, and is tempted to cling with greater tenacity to others of his own language and culture.”~ A Chance to Die, Elizabeth Elliot

I might not be a missionary but being in a foreign country with people of different cultures and languages, I can relate to this quote. I have noticed myself hanging out with the North American crowd more and more because it is easier than trying to learn the language and culture of the others. I do see the error in this. I love the people of the other cultures as much as the North Americans. I wish to get to know them and their languages by the time that we are to leave. I want to be able to talk to them in a language where they feel comfortable and able to express themselves. I pray for the opportunities to learn.

The loneliness that comes from being in a country not that of my childhood is not a sad loneliness but a happy one, if that makes any sense. It does not leave me saddened at the end of the night but grateful that I have a chance to lean more upon the familiarity that Christ brings. Plus the isolation isn’t as bad as that which is talked about in the text due to the fact that there are 23 other Canadians here as well J

Through all of this God is cleaning me out. It hurts but I needed to leave in order for it to happen. To be surrounded by His words, presence and people who are also seeking Him at the cost of a year of normal life, is an amazing environment to be cleansed. My view of my sin hasn’t changed, it’s just become clearer. The lectures this week have magnified all the things that I have been forgetting about the character of Christ.

Reading about Solomon and David have a way of taking off the blinders. To hear about the raw honesty of both of them convicts me of my complacency. It shows me of the compromises that I have let into my life: the things that I have reasoned my conscious quite on. It shines a light on the darkness of my heart. For that I am thankful.

Including this and many times where I laughed until I couldn’t breathe. these past few weeks have been amazing! I have learnt knew things and grown in my love for those around me and most of all the God who brought me here. I have come to appreciate those things that He has blessed me with and embrace the things that are new. I am content to be shaped by Him and to be wherever He calls me to be. 

Settling in... :)

Things are finally settling down. I am getting more comfortable with my surroundings and the people that I am going to be spending the next 9 months with. The first few weeks were a bit stressful trying to figure people out and create a new routine. Lectures were just starting and assignments were coming in. God had a lot to teach me about looking to Him for assurance and not those around me. One of the girls gave a devotion at breakfast a few days ago and it talked about looking to God for our acceptance and it was a really good reminder.

We have family groups every second Sunday night and they are probably one of my favourite things. We have a meal with a family that is either staff or a family from he community that has been a part of the school in the past. My family group "Parents" used to be students about 6 years ago. There are 6 students and 1 staff member in my family group and we get to do assignments together :) Small groups are definitely more my thing than large groups. We are also starting up book reading groups this next Monday and I'm pretty excited for the same reason as the family groups. Being able to get to know people in smaller groups is exciting for me. You get to know who the people are in a more relaxed environment.

There are a lot of German speaking students here so I have decided to start learning some German. My hope is to be able to have real conversations with them by the end of the 9 months... It's going to take a lot of work but I'm kind of excited. They are really easy to practice with which makes it so much easier. I just have to stick to it for the whole time and not give up when it gets tough. Maybe I will have to visit them in Germany for a while so that I can become immersed in the language and be forced to learn it compared to being able to speak English whenever I want to. We'll see.

Lectures have started and we have already finished two topics. The first one was on the whole Bible and the next one was on the accuracy and reliability of it, and we are currently doing a series on the Holy Spirit. So far the topics have been really good but this last one has been a bit hard to follow because of all the rabbit trails that we end up on during class. We get new seating arrangements every two weeks and we aren't allowed to sit by the same people which is fun. I like it but I also would like being able to sit in the same place every time though. I am a creature of habit.

Travel weekend is coming up in a few weeks and I am still unsure if I want to go somewhere or stay at the school and take the weekend to just relax and do whatever I want with no pressure to be anywhere but meals. The campus is starting to feel like home and I am a homebody more than an adventurer so we'll see what ends up happening.